You’ve never been able to resist the urge of purchasing items you don’t need but you’ve successfully found different hiding places for them. You’ve used the guilt trip in persuading your husband into buying you those new leather boots and that suede jacket even though you secretly bought a similar kind not long ago. But now you’ve maxed out the joint account and the secrets out. Stephanie Wilkins tells us how she managed to spend just under £40, 000 on clothes and accessories in just a year without her husband realising.
You’re walking down the high street towards the car park after having a long day at work. You need something to calm your nerves. You enter a trendy looking clothes shop and receive a warm and friendly welcome from the sales assistant. After a few seconds, you pick out a blue top and make your way to the counter. You’re stress levels are back to normal and you complete your journey with the satisfaction of going home with something new.
When you get home you look at the £20 top and realise you don’t like it after all. You put it at the back of the wardrobe along with all the other clothes you don’t like with the hope that one day you will change your mind.
Welcome to the world of a woman. Nowadays, we crave to live like those celebrities we read about in magazines and although we may not earn as much, we revolve most of our finance around our appearance as an attempt to look and dress like them. In a generation where we spend more than we earn, with the fashion trends changing so rapidly and the growth of the many choices of clothes, shoes and accessories all of different colours, materials and styles, it’s difficult to decide on what outfit you want the most. So why not buy them all?
Women own £7.3 billion worth of clothes
Stephanie Wilkins, 27, from West London, does exactly that. Like most women, Stephanie loves to shop, but unless you’re Victoria Beckham, who spends £100,000 per year on her wardrobe and ‘spent £8.5 million in her first year of married life’ according to i.village.co.uk, most women don’t usually buy the same top in all colours. Earning just over £1000 a month, Stephanie spends over a half of her wages on goods with an approximation of £300 a month just on unnecessary items.
A previous survey by Churchill Home Insurance revealed that British women own £7.3 billion worth of clothes that they don’t even wear in their lifetime. According to guardian.co.uk, consumer debt is one of the most rapidly growing problems in the UK with over a quarter of Britons struggling with over £8,000 personal debts as a result of purchasing unnesessary goods believing that it is important to keep up with the latest trend.
According to one of the largest studies of women’s fashion shopping habits in the 1980s, the Wells Rich Green Survey revealed that women who are not as independent and confident about themselves tend to shop more and care more about their clothes and appearance. Addictions.co.uk once stated that ‘compulsive shopping is a form of behaviour to avoid reality.’ Purchasing items of clothing, shoes or accessories every day, Stephanie admits she does it because it makes her feel better about herself.
"I couldn't leave without buying something"
Debt and appearance has become a 21st century phenomenon. In a day where we mould our lives around celebs, we make time to slap on make-up, go shopping and look good by giving up our time to do things that actually matter. Instead of eating on her lunch breaks, Stephanie hit the shops with the feeling that she wouldn’t be spending too much. She said: “I felt that I’d rather use the money on something I can wear, I couldn’t walk past a shop without having a look inside and I couldn’t leave without buying something.”
During the four months of her excessive shopping habit, Stephanie lost just over a stone. Money which would have usually been spent on food was spent on clothes. “Buying something different was like an energy boost,” she said. It was only when she got home that the boost was replaced with a dark feeling of guilt.
Lying to husband of 3 years, Tony Wilkins, 29, was the only regret she had. Sneaking around the house finding different locations for the new items of clothing was part of an everyday chore Stephanie kept up with so that he didn’t find out.
"I'd tell him I had it for ages"
She confessed: “I emptied out the shopping bags before I got out of the car and squeezed as much as I could in my handbag, sometimes I put them on and throw the bags in the bin...if Tony asked where I got my new outfit from, I’d tell him I had it for ages.” A survey carried out by the price comparison site uSwitch.com in 2006 showed that 15% of women hide their statements and new purchases from their partner and claim that it’s old.
Trying different things to create more space for the new items, Stephanie decided to give some of the clothes to charity. Telling Tony that the clothes no longer fit her, she left four bags outside for the charity to collect giving her more reason to buy new outfits. The four bags found themselves hidden in the spare room once Tony had fallen asleep.
Women tend to feel the need to keep the clothes they may no longer wear because of the cost and past memories such items may remind them of, according to authors Guy, Banim and Green of the book Through the Wardrobe: Women’s Relationships with Their Clothes. The more expensive an item is the more they want to hold on to it, even if it is out of fashion.
"Managing money was a problem I never attempred to solve"
Yet Stephanie’s problem didn’t stop there. Knowing there wasn’t enough in the joint account for Tony’s personal spending and her shopping needs, she panicked and applied for a credit card realising her daily shopping spree needed to come to an end after being unable to meet its monthly payments.
Her thoughts of ending the shopping habit were replaced with thoughts of endless shopping. Regardless of her credit card, Stephanie continued eating just one small meal a day leaving her more to spend on clothes.
Her continuous purchasing problem had been fulfilling her personal desires for nearly a year landing her in just under £40,000 debt. Stephanie admitted: “managing money had always been a problem that I had never attempted to solve.”
She confessed to Tony about her problem after receiving a number of notices through the post.
“I was more ashamed than afraid when I told Tony. He didn’t speak to me. The next day he dragged me to the shops and gave me £20.” No longer did the need to shop feel right. Stephanie began to hate what she was doing and it didn’t make her feel better anymore. Going home with that £20 note and not spending it was another accomplishment she had made. Tony reassured her he’d help and support her if she helped herself.
The next step
Sufferers of compulsive shoppers can be treated alongside alcoholics and drug addicts. According to the guardian.co.uk, ‘the condition has led to family break-ups, depression, homelessness and even suicide.’
With the help and support from Tony, Stephanie decided to refer herself to a counsellor in November, 2007. Since then she has managed to sell most of her clothes and shoes at a car boot sale and although she admits to having the urge to go shopping now and again, she has cut down drastically on her spending.
Stephanie and Tony are now cutting costs to help pay off their arrears which is proving to be a success.
If you would like more information on purchasing or if you are suffering from the problem, you can visit http://www.addictions.co.uk/ or call Debtors Anonymous on 01426947150.
